• Do you lack the confidence to take on a new challenge?
• Are you missing out on exciting opportunities due to a lack of confidence?
• Ever wondered how those "he's so, she's so confident" types do it?
• Do you want to stop holding yourself back and move forward with more oomph?

Do you hop from one project to another and not really progress with anything?

Do you feel overwhelmed by the stuff in your head?

Do you crave clarity, energy and focus but instead feel stressed, time poor and frustrated?

Follow the iWISH,iCAN,iWILL 4G challenge

GET CLEAR

GET A PLAN

GET SUPPORT

GET GOING

Make your goals become reality!

I’ve recently met with several clients who told me one of the biggest challenges they faced ( especially at work) was that they didn’t feel very important.  In various work situations they’d been made to feel small, insignificant and had felt over powered.

Are you important? …I think you probably are!

You decide.

Act as if you are. Forget about other people taking away your power , making you feel small and insignificant.

People can only have your power if you give it to them.

TAKE BACK THE CONTROL

Watch your self in everyday situations. Take yourself lightly, but seriously.Don’t demean or denigrate yourself. Don’t set yourself up to be the one who’s not taken seriously, the joke figure, overlooked.

Do you “get” you?

Loosing sight of yourself is really easy when you have a busy schedule and lots of commitments. Unless you start to appreciate your worth and value in this way , you can’t use it to make it work for you

“Reasons to be immensley proud of myself“

Jot yourself a list of at least 10 things to be proud of.

What comes to mind straight away?

This list tells you how brilliant you already are, how accomplished, how clever, how downright fantastic you are. USE IT… BELIEVE IT….ACT IT

I AM A VIP

I AM IMPORTANT

Life moves on, situations change, your circumstances alter and new challenges and opportunities present themselves all the time. You may well want something different now to what you had a year ago.

Having more of what you want is sometimes only possible when you actually say no to what you don’t want.

With that in mind …

What do you no longer want in your life?

What’s no longer working for you?

What do you no longer want to tolerate, put up with or say yes to?

Make a list of  5  things you most definitely don’t want in your life.  Clear up, clean out and make room for something  far more  beneficial, empowering and positive.

Hi Everyone,

I’m so thrilled to tell you that after months of  research, development, blood sweat and laughter…

iWISH, iCAN, iWILL

Is Going Global With Its First

Online, Interactive, Multimedia Coaching Programme.

iWSH iCAN iWILL

Helps You Make Decisons That Matter Most

ITS THE LOOK BEFORE THE LEAP!

If you’d like to be the first of many to experience the power of iWISH, iCAN, iWILL  as an online, interactive and multimedia coaching programme then you are in the right place.

Full details to be released to soon.

Sign up for the latest information on launch dates, updates, bonus material, and how you can access this fantastic coaching resource as soon as its available.

Please  pop your details in the box to the right of your screen.

(no one else will get their hands on this, I don’t share names or email addresses with anyone, I only share fantastic life changing skills & techniques)

Thank you for coming to visit

iWISH, iCAN, iWILL

WATCH THIS SPACE !!!!!

• Visit a local farmers market and marvel at the range of produce
• Take a  rowing boat out on a local lake
• Make a great big juicy chocolate cake and enjoy eating it!
• Walk in the autumn leaves and play catch a falling leaf! Enjoy the crunch
• Borrow a dog and take it for a walk
• Find a cosy country pub for Sunday lunch
• Snuggle up under a blankey and watch a brilliant movie
• Visit a department store and have your make-up done
• Saturday afternoon shop,  coffee, cake, show ‘n’ tell, champagne combo
• Cocktails in a really flash cocktail bar
• Early doors Saturday evening and home in time for a X Factor and a takeaway
• Sunday morning papers in bed
• Wrap up and go for a picnic at the top of a hill with a view
• Get on a bus and see where it takes you
• Get a blow dry and a manicure
• Go see a movie  -  popcorn pick ‘n’ mix and full fat tango!
• Visit a comedy club
• Visit your local garden centre and stock up on spring bulbs
• Pick Your Own berries and make jam
• Veg out and do SOD ALL !

If you’re having a particularly bad day, its possible to have a real downer on yourself and what you are capable of. You loose sight of your strengths, have no confidence in your abilities and you need a simple way of picking yourself back up and refocusing.

This is often best done through the eyes of someone else and the following exercise will help raise your level of self awareness and confidence in your abilities.

I have to say the first time I did the exercise I found it really difficult to ask the questions. Part of me really didn’t want to know the answers and the other part thought it was a little self-indulgent. So I emailed them to 5 people I knew would be honest, hit the send button and hid behind a cushion for 24 hours until the responses came back.  You know what?  I found it to be one of the most powerful and rewarding coaching exercises I’ve ever completed.

Stephen Covey sums it up:

“Suddenly I saw things differently, and because I saw things differently,

I thought differently, I felt differently, and I behaved differently’

Ask Five People Exercise

Ask five people (whose opinion you trust and respect) from different areas of your life the following questions:

1. What is the first thing you think of when you think of me?
2. What one word or phrase describes me best?
3. What one thing could I change for my own benefit?
4. What do you value most about me
5. What do you think are my greatest talents, skills and accomplishments?

Believe me this is great. Have the confidence to put it out there and just see what comes back.

See you soon

Claire

I was about to start writing about my crap day when all of a sudden .. as if by magic…. this post by Karen Skidmore from Can Do  Can Be  dropped in to my inbox. It was so spot on I couldn’t help but share. Karens up beat and positive suggestions made me reach for the Hob Nobs and feel instantly better. (Well its a bit to early to hit the bottle !)

If you work from home, it’s easy not see any one for several days. Especially if you work with clients by email or phone.

There is no coffee room talk or quick catch-ups by the photocopying machine that you used to have in PAYE world.  And sometimes it can feel just darn lonely being your own boss.

So what happens to your motivation when you have a bad day?

We all get them, don’t we?  A client who cancels a meeting at the last minute.  5 rejections on your follow up phone calls, one after another.  A laptop that decides to stop working when you have a proposal that needs doing.

If you are lucky enough to have a supportive partner or a good friend who understands what it is you are trying to achieve, then it makes it easier.  But many of you don’t.  There may even be people around you who don’t really believe that you will succeed in your plans and possibly don’t even want you to, for what ever reason.

This is why it is good to have a couple of simple strategies up your sleeve that will allow you to pick yourself after a bad day and get back on the straight and narrow.  Here are some of my favourites:

Know when to stop. One bad thing seems to attract another and when you are feeling this way, it is far better to move away from what you are doing.  Stop forcing yourself to follow up those phone calls, for example, when you are beginning to believe that you are only going to get “no’s”.  Because that is exactly what you will get at that time.

Take a break. Go out for a walk, tweet away on Twitter, do some household chores, go out and buy a newspaper – it doesn’t really matter what it is a long as you are able to distance yourself from the stuff that doesn’t seem to be going your way.

Have a business buddy. A friend may not understand what you are going through if you phone up for a moan (and can quite often encourage you to moan even more if they are being sympathetic to your needs!)  Having one or two business buddies – people you feel you can be honest with and yet can encourage each other to move forward with projects and ideas – can be a lifesaver on a bad day.  Having someone who understands but keeps you on track with a little kick on your behind!

Play your favourite tune. Cheesey I know, but playing your favourite upbeat music and having a little dance around the office can do wonders for a mind shift. No one is watching after all!

Make a daily list of achievements.  A great habit to get in to is to write down the 3 things you have been most proud of each day in a journal, diary or on your PC.  It could be as amazing as winning a huge contract or as small as making a call to someone you have been putting off for weeks.  Whenever you feel like the business is against you, read through your lists and realise how much you have achieved already.

Remember not every day is going to be a great day.  There will be days that clients cancel, work goes wrong.  You can’t control other people’s (and technology!) actions.  But the one thing you can control is the way you deal with those actions when they happen.

What do you do to get over your crap days?

“Karen Skidmore helps small business owners attract more of the right clients. Specialising in web tech marketing, Karen created the Web Tech Club to show you how to use tools such as email newsletters, blogs, Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn.
To get the latest tips & advice, click here to sign up for your updates right now!”

Hyperlinks to the web tech club www.webtechclub.com on “Web Tech Club” and my website www.candocanbe.com on “click here to sign up” would be much appreciated :O)

• Overwhelmed and in-undated with things to do?

• Is your head space cluttered with thoughts, anxieties and “stuff” that needs dealing with?

• So much to do, so little time, nothing getting finished?

• Are you going round in circles?

Mental clutter keeps you stationary. The idea of clearing your mental desk is to get everything out of your head and on to paper. You can then stop thinking about it and give your brain room to breeeeath, think more clearly and give quality time and thinking to the stuff that matters not the clutter.

“Aaaahhh now that feels better already.”

We all have thousands of thoughts every day as well as tasks to complete. This runs on a loop in your head gathering momentum and extra cargo until you’re  just about to spontaneously combust. People to see, friends to call, bills to pay, cars to tax, packed lunches to make, shopping to buy, activities to book, rush rush rush and on and on it goes.

Over time your brain keeps collecting things to do and stores them for later. As you go about your daily routine certain objects, emails and conversations spark a thought, a reminder of yet another thing that needs to be dealt with. This undoubtedly can cause you an awful lot of stress and anxiety, because your brain constantly feels the pressure of needing to do something but not actually getting it all done.

“That’s just life isn’t it ” I hear you say.  Well yes it is but that never ending to do list clogs your brain, clouds your thinking and prevents you from moving forward. In fact, you’re so busy thinking about what needs to be done and collecting more to add to the list, you don’t actually get anything done properly. So not only have you got a huge list …. Most of what’s on it is incomplete or hasn’t even been started.

Many people can handle this type of stress the patient people who pld through and decide to get it done when they can. But that doesn’t make the problems go away and of course, the task needs to get done eventually. Its still on a loop in your head and pops up when you least expect it.

It really is worth becoming aware of how you think when it comes to task and thought accumulation and storage. Every now and again its time to have a good old BRAIN DUMP, so that you stop fanning around and focus on whats important.

So here’s a solution to help you deal with that mental clutter!

Have One Almighty Brain Dump! (regularly)

Step 1

• Lock yourself away somewhere quite and alone for 15- 30 minutes

• Take a full page of blank paper, then sit down and write down everything that’s bothering you. Stuff you’re worried about, things to get done, things that are constantly on your mind relating to family, friends, kids, work, holidays etc. Include everything you’re thinking about not just task related thoughts.

• No one else is going to see this so don’t hold back, don’t hesitate and don’t edit your thinking. Let it all out. Have a good old DUMP!

• Once you’ve done this you’ll start to feel a lot better because you  don’t need to use your brain to keep track of all this “stuff”

Step 2

• With the content from your brain “dumped” on to paper, the next step is to organize the information so that you’re in a better place to process it.

• Work through the list andplace a tick next to the things outside of your control.

• Once you’ve ticked them, spend a few minutes considering each tick and consciously make a decision here and now to let them go. If you really can’t do anything about them then what’s the point worrying about them? Storing  them is just taking up valuable space and energy?

Step 3

• Put a star next to all the things you need and want to take action on.

• If it helps, categorize them eg  ”work” and “Home” and “Socializing” what ever works for you and your life

• In each category, rank them in order of importance form most important to least important.

No more than 10 tasks

Step 4

• Commit yourself to tackle each item one by one

• By sifting  out the most important  tasks and dealing with them  this is extremely helpful  way to let go of mental control of everything.
• Take half an hour today and just see what impact it has on you.
• Remember it’s important to let go of things once they are dumped and then rely on the paper, not your brain for tracking things.
• Make this part of your weekly routine.
• By clearing your mind it going to help you discover new things and help you feel fresh and revived.
• Clear out what really isn’t useful and help yourself move forward.

What is Early Life Crisis?

Does it affect you?

What can you do about it?

WOW! What a weekend it was! Whether you indulged in Royal Wedding mania or not, I feel  that at last, I have some peace and quiet after what has been an amazing, enjoyable and  mega long break. I did attempt some work last week  between Easter and “The Wedding” but it really didn’t happen.

Back to it this morning…kids bundled off to school with Dad,  laundry on the line( well its a good drying day), hot mug of  tea in hand  and .. OMG the bliss of no noise. Such frenetic activity in the last few days (we had a party then spent 2 days clearing up !) and now, all is calm. At last I can focus on the job in hand, which is to kick start my business activities after the 3 week lull.

But you know what my biggest discovery  has been in the last 3 weeks ?….. Turing the sound off on my SMART phone!

Now this might sound obvious to some of you, but its not  something I’ve really done before (apart from when I go to bed!).  I know it drives people mad when they can’t get hold of you, especially the ” I’ve called you 3 times”  partner, friend or offspring. But the sense of control it gives you over your time is immense. Also don’t you just hate it when a bing, beep, zip or dingdong becomes more important than you !

So here you have it ……

10  GOOD REASONS to turn off the “not so SMART phone”……..

1. It stops you jumping up and reacting to every bing, beep, zip and ding dong.
2. It enables you to be more efficient and focused in responding to messages when you decide to attend to them.
3. Your day, evening or weekend is not  ruined should  a snotty message drop into your inbox. (The Friday 5.25pm is the real killer!)
4. It enables you to focus on important activities without interruption, therefore giving you a better chance of getting them finished.
5. It frees up your head space to think more clearly.
6. You don’t get sucked in to endless web surfing at a time in your day that’s not  really suitable.
7. You can avoid unnecessary or unwanted chats, texts and tweets.
8. When you do get round to reading and responding, the quality of your time + attention is far greater.
9. You don’t hate yourself for not completing the tasks you set yourself  at the beginning of the day.
10. You are in control of your day rather than your smart phone.

Now who’s the SMART one!… HA!